Assalamualaikum
I'm really sorry for the delay of this post. I must admit that my increasing number of readers kind of make me a bit self-conscious to write. I wrote several drafts for the past few weeks and kept on err rewriting
all of them. In the end, I thought what the heck, I'm just going to write this one and straight away post it. So here goes...
There's something that I have not mentioned regarding my wearing the hijab. That is actually I first started wearing it when I was eleven...yes, you read it right...
eleven. It was only when I was in the UK that I decided to abandon it under the pretense of for fear of my 'safety'. Why do I say 'pretense'? Well...for starters the boarding school that I went to could be one of the safest places in the world. I was 16 when I went there and even at that time I was aware that if I were to wear my hijjab, nothing would have happened to me as the people in that school were very nice and friendly. But still, I chose to flaunt my hair and even bought a pair of hair straightener! (Hiya! waste of money I tell you!).
So that's the way how it was, for the next 3 years after that, everytime I landed my feet in Brunei, the hijjab would be on but once the feet were roaming around the wet England roads, my hair would be swaying down my back for the whole world to see. Hypocrite you might say? Well, thats exactly how I felt about myself at that time. Sigh...if only I could turn back the time...
In one of my previous posts
(here) I mentioned some of the difficulties that I faced when I first donned the Hijjab in the UK. Now I'm back, I'm still facing more challenges but not in terms of wearing the hijjab but in term of putting on the right
clothing befitting a true muslimah. Somehow I think the challenges I'm facing here seem to be greater than the ones that I faced in a non-muslim country.
My dear sisters,
Have you ever chosen a tight shirt over a loose one as the later won't show off your curves?
(And also because it can make you look older than your age?)
Have you ever chosen a short shirt which shows off you bum over a long one as the later won't show off your long lean legs?
(And also because it can make you look shorter and hence chubbier?)
Have you ever chosen a short-sleeved shirt over a long-sleeved one as the later will make you sweat like there's no tomorrow?
(And also because all the nice shirts/blouses are short sleeved. The long sleeved ones are rather drabby looking.)
Have you ever chosen a tight/short/short-sleeved shirt because you don't want to look different from your trendy and fashionable friends?
(Beside most girls in Brunei are wearing tight/short/short-sleeved shirts with the hijjab still nicely concealing their hair. So might as well join the crowd you know. Plus you wouldn't want to look like a mother who is chaperoning you chic looking friends.)
I'm ashamed to say that I have to say 'yes' to all the above questions (and statements). Especially the last one. Wearing a long, loose, long-sleeved shirt with hijjab covering my hair and chest area together with a pair of baggy trousers would mean that I will look exceptionally different from my friends. And not to mention much older. The funny thing is, I didn't feel this way when I was back in UK. I felt totally at ease sitting in between friends cum classmates who wore mini skirts and spaghetti straps.
I think it's because at that time I was aware that my classmates were non-muslims so we were meant to be different in a lot of ways. But here in Brunei, I see all the muslim ladies as equals. When you are equal, you are supposed to be the same in a lot of ways. Including the way how you dress. And this makes me unconsciously think that if it's ok for 'X' to wear a tight shirt with hijjab, then it should be ok for me too. We truly are influenced by the people around us. I have the feeling that I'm not the only one who unconsciously feels this way.
Sisters, did you agree with any of the questions I asked above? Any ‘yes’ there (like me) as an answer albeit one. To those who answered ‘yes’: We are a bunch of silly creatures don’t you think? Sorry if I sounded so insulting but seriously, we are actually willing to sacrifice ourselves in the hellfire so long as we don’t look OLD!.....OLD!
"Sesungguhnya sebilangan ahli neraka ialah perempuan-perempuan yang berpakaian tapi telanjang yang condong pada maksiat dan menarik orang lain untuk melakukan maksiat . Mereka tidak akan masuk syurga dan tidak akan mencium baunya." ( Bukhari dan Muslim.)
Translation: "Among the dwellers of hell are such women as are clothed yet naked, seduced and being seduced. These shall not enter the Garden, nor shall (even) its fragrance reach them." (Bukhari and Muslim)
We are actually willing to let ourselves being hanged by the hair in the hellfire until our brains literally boil so long as we don’t look less chic or unsophisticated here in dunyah.
" Wahai anakku Fatimah ! Adapun perempuan-perempuan yang akan digantung rambutnya hingga mendidih otaknya dalam neraka adalah mereka itu di dunia tidak mahu menutup rambutnya daripada dilihat oleh lelaki yang bukan mahramnya " (Bukhari dan Muslim.)
My own translation: "O my daughter Fatimah! There will be women who are hanged from their hair until their brains boil in the hellfire and these are those who do not want to cover their hair from the non-mahram males." (Bukhari and Muslim.)
We truly need to set our priorities straight. Sometimes we tend to forget that we are not here in this world forever. Us, humans are blessed with intelligence ( akal) and sometimes it is worth to just sit back and ponder what is the real purpose of our lifes. The way we live today is as if we truly do not care whether we enter paradise or hellfire. The way we live today is as if we are strong enough to face the toments that await us in the hellfire. The choice is truly ours. Hope we are not too late.
Last but not least, Prophet Muhammad (SAW) said: "O women! Give alms, as I have seen that the majority of the dwellers of Hell-fire were you (women)."
Are we ready?
...Hayatilah....Fahamilah....Renungilah...
